Self harm

A forum exclusively for 13-19 year olds to connect and share experiences. Always let people know where you are going and don't give out personal information online.

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Postby vicki » Wed May 28, 2008 9:44 pm

Hi Hen,

Young people who self harm have often had very difficult or painful experiences and they may be self harming as a way to deal with problems and the pressures of everyday life. Please do not pass judgement on something which you do not understand. Although I have never self harmed I was bulimic nearly all my teenage years, this was very much a way of coping with the pressure I was under.

Nicola, I’m glad you’ve found the message board and great that you’re talking to someone about your problems. I have congenitally corrected transposition and pulmonary stenosis too- there’s a few of us on the board. Are you on msn? There are loads on the message board who are - I’ll PM you my messenger if you want.

The links which Ann has put up are full of useful information.

Take care everyone

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hi vicki

Postby Hen » Thu May 29, 2008 7:59 pm

VICKI i was not passing judgement i was just pointing out that this could cause more problems down the road and if these people are self harming now to deal with a current problem ie chd what lenths will they go too to try and deal with if there self harm leads to a problem. i just want them to understand that if they challenged their emotions and troubles in to something else that is not bad for them or just talk to somebody

and i think i do understand the strains and problems associated with living with a chd
as i have being living with a multi complicated chd all my life
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Postby Paul Polo Willgoss » Thu May 29, 2008 9:43 pm


please remember that this is a support board, people are entitled to their opinion and to put it up.

However, if it slips accidentally into what could be considered personal commentary then I may have to moderate the posts.

It is not anyones place to pass judgement on someone elses decisions, all we can do is offer our opinions based on our own experiences, but please understand that how each and everyone of our conditions (be it cardiac, mental health, endocrine, whatever) affects us is unique and we all cope in different ways.

Lecture over

The year of the mid-life crisis
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Postby lbloomer » Wed Jun 04, 2008 8:38 am


i can see this from both sides i think. i can understand what hen is saying, why give yourself more problems when you already got a hundred to deal with. However, having been through what alot of you are going through (wow i sound old, im only 22 !) its not acutally giving you more problems its a coping mechanism and wiht out self harm you cope less well.

Thats the bit that people who havnt been through it dont understand, self harming at that point in your life helps for what ever reason. Its not logical and not thought out its jsut a way to cope.

Personally i only stopped when my life got better, the final year of my degree, and once id brocken the habbit of coping that way im much less likely to go back to it wen things go bad.

Anyway, i hope that hasnt made things worse!!

Love Lisa, xx.
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Postby Annabelle » Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:14 pm

Hi all
I'm 26 so sorry to be writing on the teenagers board but I thought I'd let you know what I know about self harm. from my personal experience and my neuroscience studies.
Self harm is a sign/symptom of depression.It does not necessarily mean you have depression but the likelihood is that you do. When you are depressed there is a chemical imbalance in your brain that needs to be rebalanced (by drugs and/or psychological therapy). Some people are born with an imbalance and some have an imbalance triggered by environmental factors,(stress etc) either way it is best to go to a GP to explain what is happening and get "re-balanced".
Self harm is a personal coping mechanism that does not work in the long run it is just emotionally and physically damaging for the self-harmer and those who love him/her . I advise anyone who is self-harming to get help. Doctors have to keep everything confidential so do not be scared that everybody will find out.
I have self harmed and it is not fun.. but does get better with the right help.

Born TGA,VSD 1982
Pulmonary artery banding and BT shunts
Rastelli, complicated by mediastenitis 1987
Elective conduit replacement 1996
Bacterial endocarditis,mediastenitis,emergency conduit 1999
Bacterial endocarditis 2011
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Postby Leah » Fri Aug 15, 2008 11:33 am

hello everyone,

my boyfriend used to self harm and still battles with depression and anxiety now. after lots of hard work he's stopped self haming, but still finds ways to release frustration or anger, like putting an elastic band around your wrist and pinging it. or get a red felt tip pen and draw it on your body where you would have normally harmed yourself.

the most important thing for family or friends affected by self harm is that it is rarely a reflection on you or anything to do with you, it's very personal to the person effected, you've done nothing wrong and you haven't made them do it.

my boyfriend has been on prozac for about 18 months now and is doing really really well, he still gets anxious sometimes but is determind to over come it and go back into the work place..
best of luck to everyone effected. xxxxxx
TGA 1988
Senning 1989
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